"Geek Cred" and How I learned to Let Go.

I suppose I should start this off by sharing my "geek cred", right? I mean, how can I not? I have to stroke my ego a bit, right?

 Okay, here's what I've got: I've been reading comics for around twenty-three years. I'm thirty, so you can do the math. Up above you'll see the first two comic books I ever bought (picked out myself, really); The Transformers #35 (1987) and Yosemite Sam and Bugs Bunny #62 (1979). I didn't actually buy either of these the year they were released, but instead picked them up from a quarter bin. I remember I was with my grandmother that weekend and she was always tight with her money, but fifty cents? Yeah, she could squeeze that.

So that's what started me off down the long and enjoyable road. I'm a comic book nut. I love them all; from all-ages books (or, as we used to call them: kids comics) to beefed-up superheroes to indie books. If you've perused this blog, then you've probably already come to that conclusion.

So, what is this post really about? It's about being able to share something you love without completely alienating the person you're trying to share it with. It's about being a fan of something and getting along with other fans. It's about personal growth, really.

I used to spend a decent amount of time roaming the CBR Forums, but eventually it became too much. I have to say it's not because I can't stand other people's opinions, but I can't stand the constant railing of comic book fans against almost everything. They want change, they get it: they hate it. They don't want change, everything stays the same: they hate it. As fans, it appears we cannot be satisfied. And it's the minority that are the most vocal. Not every comic book fan gets on the internet and loudly shouts he/she hates whatever they've decided to hate. But, honestly, that's not even what I'm talking about, really.

This article stems from the ego involved in the fan community. You'd think "geek cred" was the end all/be all as to whether or not you're a "real" fan. It appears the ultimate measure of fandom by these standards is time. 

"I've been a fan since the beginning!" 

or

"I've been reading it for ____ years!"

Any time you have a conversation about the thing you like and you preface it with "I've been into X for X amount of years!", then your ego has become too involved. If you're having a conversation with a like-minded individual, then it's a battle of who's been a fan longest and not really about much else. Sure, sometimes it evolves into a pretentious pissing contest of epic proportions when you start talking about what you like about each thing. 

Just for example: one person's a big fan of Batman's Knightfall storyline, but the other guy is a fan of Hush... someone will undoubtedly tell the other person they're wrong for that opinion. Or, belittle it in the face of their own superior opinion.

But what if the other person is not a fan? These are the people with the biggest hurdles to jump in order to get into pretty much any fan community. Start throwing your "geek cred" at them and your pretentious opinions and you've pretty much alienated a new person. 

All this comes back to letting go. When my wife and I first started dating, I took her to see Iron Man. She knew very little of the character and, honestly, didn't give a shit. She was more impressed with my passion about the medium than my knowledge, but again... didn't give a shit about comics. Then she saw the movie and was instantly hooked. She wanted to read the comics and become involved in everything Iron Man. Well, I bought her a few Iron Man books and it just wasn't her thing. Not comic books in general, no. She ended up liking The Walking Dead and Fables a lot, but just not super hero comics in general. And as much as I wanted her to like my cape comics more, I realized they're not for everyone. 

That was a big step for me as a geek. Realizing that in the greater scheme of things, no matter how much I liked something... sometimes it doesn't mean shit to someone else. Not in a bad way, mind you. Again, my wife loves my passion for the medium and even loves some comics herself, but in the end, it's not really her thing and... that's okay. She can love the hell out of the Iron Man and super hero movies, but not give a crap about the comics and... that's okay. As a matter of fact, I think she's able to enjoy them more because she doesn't have to feel let down by any changes that are made from the source material! I envy that, but as an aside, I've let go of that too (a topic for another day, perhaps). Her ability to like or not like something doesn't effect my ability to do so. My experience with the interest at hand also doesn't make my opinions superior to hers or anyone new to the interest.

And that's kind of my point; you can have been "into" something from the beginning or for years and it not mean a damn thing to anyone else. People new to the interest may value your opinion and look for guidance, but in the end it may not mean anything to them once they've found their way to enjoy something. As an old fan, you should let your passion infect others instead of alienate. Share instead of shun. If you really want your interest to survive, it'll take more than you as a fan. So, take a step back and stop prefacing everything with, "I've been a fan since..." because it really doesn't mean anything to anyone but yourself and your ego.

Also,  if you were paying attention, you'd have noticed that while I was not able to share my love of super hero comics with my wife, I was able to share my love of comics and, as a result, brought someone new into the hobby; a die-hard Walking Dead comic fan that, ha ha, was into it before the show. So, I guess she has a little "geek cred" herself now, huh?

;)